Talking to strangers: What good design misses out on
We’ve been taught to be scared of strangers, and as a woman living in a busy city, I (sadly) understand why I should be wary of people I don’t know, and not put myself in a vulnerable position.
So tell me why I love talking to strangers?
In fact, I’ve made a career out of talking to strangers. Asking them how their day has been, what their morning, afternoon, or week has been like. I listen to their stories and their interests and how they feel about the world around them and how it affects their daily lives. Then I thank them for spending time with me, and I’m not scared.
As a user researcher we talk to strangers as part of the job, but we don’t call it that. That’s because we come from a position of power and we decide the questions and we are deciding how we meet. Although that can feel like ‘protection’ when we invite relative strangers into our buildings, our computers, it actually removes a lot of the genuine human connection and communication we need to be fostering.
When you think of someone as a stranger, you can come in curious, and you have no idea what they might say next. There is something in the ‘protection’ and power of a research position that can take that away and you start to let your own ideas of the conversation take over before you’ve even let it flourish.
When you think of someone as a stranger, you start to realise all these constructs we’ve put in our way that takes the inclusion, the kindness, and the human communication out of the process.
For example:
Why would you ask a stranger to come to a random building when you want to ask them about transport? (interviews)
How weird is it to arrange a time and send links to a stranger to access something when they could just use the app or website on their own device as they go through their day? (early stage usability testing)
What makes you think anyone would be immediately comfortable in a room full of other strangers, organised by a stranger, who thinks they are similar to everyone else in the room? (focus group)
It’s weird the things we ask strangers to do for the sake of research and design.
I’m not saying don’t do any of these methods, they all have their place. And I’m not saying you need to approach strangers at random.
And some strangers still can put you in a position of danger, which I have experienced. After joining people on journeys around their city to learn about public transport. The individuals needed a phone number to meet up and my personal number was given out. After the research ended I received regular messages without my consent.
Speaking to strangers is not forgetting ‘stranger danger’ but planning for it instead.
So, I am not saying forget about your safety and protection that the job role of researcher or designer should give you. (Early career researcher Alex made this mistake so you don’t have to!)
What I am saying is leave a little room for a stranger to tell you something you never expected, because that’s what we expect of strangers, to surprise us.
What I am saying is think of that person as interesting and if you wanted to learn something from them, how can you make that conversation as easy as possible.
Thinking of someone as a stranger helps you think inclusively, helps you manage your own safety in the design process, and it helps you understand the true needs of your audience.
Strangers are fascinating because you learn something completely new every time. Those preconceptions of what should be covered disappear when you remember that this is a stranger to you. It’s someone else’s life, day, morning, afternoon, week, not yours or mine.
Next time you are running a design process, try this perspective out and I promise you will learn something new every time.